Turning Criticism Into Growth

The Nature of Criticism

Have you ever been criticized by someone? Or perhaps you’ve criticized another at least once in your life? What brought that criticism about—someone’s actions, words, or creations?

Was it motivated by love and truth, offering clarity and direction?

Or was it driven by frustration, judgment, or ego?

How did that criticism land? Was it a personal attack, or was it aimed at addressing an issue to help someone grow?

My Personal Encounter With Criticism

When I think about criticism in my own life, one memory stands out. I was a young song leader in church. Like every Sunday, I led the congregation in worship until the next minister stepped in. By the end, I was exhausted and simply made my way to my seat.

That’s when a Christian brother approached me. He offered his stern “two cents.” I didn’t expect it, and I didn’t know how to respond. All I could do was thank him.

But when I got home, his words weighed heavily. I felt condemned—worthless, even. His criticism looped in my mind like a broken record. It shook my confidence in song leading. I prayed, asking God if I had made mistakes, reflecting on every detail. Still, the weight of his words clung to me.

I knew I had a choice: either let those words destroy me or bring them before God. So, in humility, I knelt in prayer. I asked for grace and strength to overcome what felt like a demonic whisper. Hours later, revelation came—and I felt free.

The Revelation That Set Me Free

What was the insight?

In that dark moment, I realized something profound: God can express His love through anyone in the church—even through criticism. This brother’s words weren’t perfect, and his delivery was harsh. Yet God used him to highlight areas where I could grow—song leading, leadership, creativity.

Instead of resenting him, I chose to thank God for him. I may not have agreed with his method, but I could still learn from the message. The lesson was simple: don’t focus on how criticism is delivered—focus on what you can take from it.

Shaping Our Response to Criticism

Here’s the truth: you and I cannot control criticism. But we can control our response. Criticism is neutral—it is simply information. It becomes positive or negative depending on our interpretation. With the right attitude—humility and openness—criticism becomes a tool for growth.

Those who criticize us are like mail carriers. Their job is only to deliver the message. What we do with that message—that’s where our real work begins.

Learning to Discern and Filter

Growth rarely happens in comfort. It comes in moments of crisis, when criticism knocks at our door. So when others criticize you, sincerely thank them. Then filter what they’ve said. Their words may contain some truth, but not the whole truth. Often, critics speak from bias, assumptions, or what they think they would do in your place—not from lived experience.

After more than 30 years of ministry, I’ve learned to filter and discern. I now ask:

• Is this person speaking from theory, hearsay, or lived reality?
• Does their feedback reveal fact, perspective, or projection?

A Final Word

Criticism, if received wisely, is never your enemy.

It can refine you, sharpen you, and prepare you for greater influence.

So embrace it. Turn it into fuel for growth. Let every harsh word become a stepping stone, not a stumbling block.

Remember: you are more than a conqueror!

 

Let every harsh word become a stepping stone, not a stumbling block. #Caleb A. Tan

© 2025 Aaron Tan Ann Sen aka Caleb A. Tan. All rights reserved.